Year 1, Month 6, Day 21: Cautiously Optimistic

keep-calm-and-remain-cautiously-optimisticYear 1, Month 6, Day 21: Cautiously Optimistic

Typing post-op and while on pain meds… so please forgive any glaring typos or grammatical mistakes.  Talked with my surgeon just before surgery about the adhesion again. She same up with a plan to insert a piece of Alloderm in that area to pad it and also create space between the skin and muscle.  Alloderm is a regenerative tissue matrix made from cadaver skin. It is also used in the nipple reconstruction.  I did not get the lasers I requested, but still ended up with an element of FrankenBoobs.

As they prepped me in OR, they asked me Continue reading

Year 1, Month 6, Day 20: Purple Polka Dots


So… It’s nipple reconstruction this week. Wasn’t gonna. However I have this nasty adhesion that really messes with my brain and makes me feel less than sexy whenever I catch a glimpse of it. This whole thing about reconstruction not being augmentation – God if only people understood… the “hope” of nipple reconstruction is that in that process will somehow break up the adhesion a little. What do I have to lose right? Well… let me back up.

The only reason I scheduled nipple reconstruction was to attempt Continue reading

Day 125’ish or 126: I’m awake… I’m awake…

Day 125’ish or 126: I’m awake… I’m awake…

IMG_2777This is apparently how I look on morphine.  Love the fuzzy lens look… very soap opera right?

I have to admit this was a very fuzzy time frame for me.  The pre-surgical cocktail, with anesthesia and the pain pump.  I am not going to lie.  I sat in the quiet for a long time.  Just me, the beeping of machines, the pain pump and the occasional interruption from the nursing staff making sure all is well.  I know I made the hospital sound cold and terrible in my previous post, but I don’t know, I mean, they were efficient and methodical.  Something I appreciate… even if freaked out that I was in the basement… but face it… Continue reading

Day 119: Can we move my appointment to next week?

Day 119: Can we move my appointment to next week?

Happy DancePhone rang at 8:30 am, missed the call, picked up the voicemail… and started to do that happy dance.  The great news, they had a cancellation, the bad news I need to be in on Monday for pre-op appointment and surgery would be Wednesday.  Well…. we do love a challenge!  Now look, I am not going to say Continue reading

Day 58: Another post-op appointment and the lympha-whatsy…

Day 58: Another post-op appointment and the lympha-whatsy…

Tomorrow morning is my next, maybe last, post-op appointment for this surgery anyway. I am guessing that they will be aspirating a little fluid – yuck.  But being that I have no feeling in this area anymore, I suspect it won’t be painful.  I hope??

I am looking forward to closing out this phase of the multiphase project called cancer.  There will be at least Continue reading

Day 57: Authenticity… or is it authen-tit-tit-y

Day 57: Authenticity… or is it authen-tit-tit-y

So it was a busy day today, started with a construction meeting this morning, and some desk work sandwiched between that and the finance committee meeting and then the fundraising committee meeting.  The end of the day was a business after hours I really wanted to attend but ran out of energy, and honestly I felt a little awkward about.  Why you may wonder?

To put it simply: faux boob or not to faux boob… that was the question

Getting dressed this morning, Continue reading

Day 45: Let the healing begin…

Day 45: Let the healing begin…

Well, I ain’ gonna lie, it is weird not having boobs and even weirder having four drainage tubes with little grenade looking bulbs filling with fluid attached to your body.  Yep.  It’s just plain weird.

We just went through the process of emptying those little things, wish I could say it didn’t smart… but it did.  There is one particularly sensitive one and the fact that you are supposed to pull along the drainage tube to make sure it is empty of “old” fluids and clear of clots ads to the fun.  Doctor wants us to do this every 8 hours – we are currently recruiting volunteers for the 3am shift…

In other awesome news, I received some wonderful loves from Shannon, Fran & Bob and my team at the office.  A special thanks to Deanna for the delivery – and my apologies for sleeping through the visit.  I think I now understand what a dogs life is like.  Eat, sleep, go potty… repeat.  Once the pain meds kick in, I get a nice nap, but it seems I come out of that sleep as quickly as I fall into it.  Hopefully tonight will be more restful.  It is hard to get rest in the hospital.

Speaking of the hospital, I seriously experienced the best staff at Capital Medical Center.  From nuclear medicine, to the surgery nurse, the surgical team, anesthesiologists, recovery, night shift, everyone… absolutely amazing.  What they say about hospital food is pretty true though… 😛

But hey… look what mom made for dinner?  Pretty fabulous right?

Post op is April 1st… yes yes… April Fool’s Day.  Feels so appropriate yes?  Hope the lab results are back by then.

#‎strongerthancancer‬ ‪#‎embracingtheadventure‬ ‪#‎killerleftboob‬ ‪#‎hawtrightboob‬ ‪#‎breastcancer‬

Day 43 part 2: Friends, love and care packages.

Day 43 part 2: Friends, love and care packages.

Ok, in the midst of a meeting this afternoon I received the call from scheduling.  Check in is at 10:25 am.  Tonight my friends gave the ladies a right proper send off!

I don’t have the words to express the gratitude and love I have for these amazing people.  I am truly blessed.

It’s funny the things that emotionally get you.  The handwritten card that simply says “You are beautiful” when truly one of my biggest fears is finding my beauty again – yes I know, I am far more than my breasts, but the girls have been front and center most my life.  Hard to separate them from what makes you feel feminine and attractive.  The super soft PJs for hospital day.  The super comfy and super cool Tukwila FD “fighting for the cure” t-shirt.  The healing hands necklace and earrings.  Lip balm, tissue, super hero bracelet and super hero ring.  Facial cleansing towelettes. And so much more really.  All incredibly thoughtful tokens of love and friendship – thoughtfulness.  Perhaps most thoughtful of all was making the night “normal” amidst the chaos.

I had struggled with a ceremony for saying goodbye to the girls… And in a way that only a loving friend could, Mary wrote a prayer and shared it with us all tonight.  Yes in a bar.  Yes, at the “Last night at Bob’s with Boobs” gathering.

Tammey’s Prayer

Friends, family, acquaintances and strangers:

We have gathered here this evening to celebrate the life of Tammey and her girls, haute right boob and her evil twin, killer left boob.

The girls have given Tammey a good time, but now they’re giving her a bad time. We understand they must go in sacrifice so that we may enjoy Tammey for many more years to come.

So, Heavenly Father, we ask for your blessings for Tammy and her team of caregivers.
May you grant the surgeons plenty of rest tonight, a good cup of coffee in the morning and steady hands during surgery.

May her caregivers, family and friends have patience, understanding, a sense of humor and the ability to apply lots of TLC.

Please continue to provide Tammey with patience, tenacity and her sense of humor to help her heal through this process you have challenged her with.

And finally, we thank Tammey for her infectious positive attitude and her willingness to share this adventure with all of us.

We love you, Tammey and pray for the best!

And now, let’s toast!

Tomorrow the storm clouds part and I find the moment of calm as I drift away under the anesthetic. I will be visualizing good margins and a clean lymph node.  If you get a chance, would you please take a moment and do the same.  🙂

Wishing you all abundant blessings.

#‎strongerthancancer‬ ‪#‎embracingtheadventure‬ ‪#‎killerleftboob‬ ‪#‎hawtrightboob‬ ‪#‎breastcancer‬

Day 43: She’s radioactive!

Day 43: She’s radioactive!

So… Had preop, they gave me a nice body wash as a parting gift… And loads of stuff to read. . Had some more blood drawn… It’s like the lab just can’t get enough of me… Had the subarealor injection with the peeps in nuclear medicine… it hurt like hell… and I d

ropped the f-bomb (sorry Mom). Radiologist felt bad, nuclear med nurse said it was ok. They did put a bobo aid on it and face it… Bandaids fix anything! . I’m s’pose to massage those nuclear isotopes 3-5 minutes at least four times between now and the yet to be determined surgery date in the morning. Theme song for the day “I Touch Myself” by Chrissy Amphlett/Divinyls. Which is not short of irony – like many things along this little adventure:

Preop instructions say something about no alcohol and needing an adult to drive me home from the hospital. Seriously… I feel they need to set more appropriate goals for people having surgery. Just sayin’

#‎strongerthancancer‬ ‪#‎embracingtheadventure‬ ‪#‎killerleftboob‬ ‪#‎hawtrightboob‬ ‪#‎breastcancer‬

Day 41 & 42: The storm before the calm….

Day 41 & 42: The storm before the calm….

This is definitely an interesting process.  I’ve not had major surgery… ever… so I am planning on being “out” for a week.  Hoping that is enough.  I have been in the midst of a storm, between work projects, deadlines, meetings, getting the taxes filed and taking care of the typical things life requires and planning to potentially be “away” from life for a week or so.

Friends, family and staff have been great.  And since I don’t look or act sick, I get a fair amount teasing.  Hey… what can I say… I’m really just creating all this drama for a boob job.  😛

Tomorrow is my pre-op appointment and nuclear injection day… subareolar injection… yeah… break that word down… “sub” = below… and areola… yep yep… that is an injection into the nipple.  And nuclear?  Yeah, I will certainly have a special glow about me tomorrow night.  Who the heck thinks of this stuff?!  Good God!

Speaking of tomorrow night, my crazy and lovely friends have named it “Last Night with Boobs at Bob’s Steak Night” – we do steak nights on Wednesday, and the crazy crew has toasted #killerleftboob many times… tomorrow they help me say goodbye.  All of this I call the storm… the 3-5 hours of surgery will certainly be the calm.

Countdown is on… surgery is Thursday…

#‎strongerthancancer‬ ‪#‎embracingtheadventure‬ ‪#‎killerleftboob‬ ‪#‎hawtrightboob‬ ‪#‎breastcancer‬