Day 34: Finally… A plan and I’ve been staged…

It will grow back they said… curly they said…

Ok… We have some answers, some good news and a plan.  Let’s start with the good news.  The CT and bone scan came back clear.  There is NO indication of metastasis. This is great news.  Lymph nodes look good – although they still will want to take the sentinel node(s) next to #killerleftboob

My Oncologist (aka Potions Master), the Radiologist (aka Bones) and the Surgeon (aka Hack & Saw) all talked and came to some sort of agreement.  This is good – considering that this is a team sport.  Plastics (aka the Plastic Surgeon) was left out of this conversation as I am still interviewing candidates.  Yes, I give them all nicknames… Easier for others to keep up with the conversation.  :). And yeah, I let them know their nicknames.

The tumor sizes do appear to be closer to the 4.3cm and 5cm as reported by the MRI.  Based on this consensus is that we will call me Stage 3 (as of now – pending pathology post operatively).

So I asked the question today… survivability if no treatment other than diet and naturopathic, just surgery, surgery and radiation, surgery and chemotherapy, and the trifecta of surgery, radiation and chemotherapy… In a nutshell, Potions Master says: No surgery = 0% survivability and the cancer spreading to other organs and/or bones.  (For the record, life offers 0% survivability… Just sayin’.)  Surgery with Chemotherapy and Potions Master is throwing around the word “cured.”

Hack and Saw told the Potions Master that he believes that he can get good margins during surgery.  Therefore all agree that we should schedule surgery.  So I made the call and am waiting to hear back on a surgery date.  Since the cancer doesn’t appear to be elsewhere Potions thinks we don’t need chemo beforehand.  He also thinks we may be able to skip radiation (pending pathology post surgery confirming good margins), but doesn’t feel I should skip chemotherapy.  That whole “cured” thing he keeps bringing up…  🙂

So, his deal is that the chemotherapy will ill any rogue/remaining cancer cells in my body that might be trying to attach to my bones, liver, uterus, ovaries, etc. etc.  That part sounds good.  However, I am having a hard time getting excited about looking like a hairless cat and although I hope that tattoos will help cover the scarring left by a bilateral mastectomy, part of me is fearing that I will look like the bride of Frankenstein with large scars across an area of my body that used to be feminine and if I dare to sound full of myself, not so bad really.  In fact when I said this to Potions today, his comment was that he just saw a patient whose hair was growing back in curly and she was thrilled.  I scrunched my face and said to him, “I actually like my hair now.  In fact, I am kinda partial to my boobs too.”  #truth

So if I dare to be honest, which I can’t seem to help as I share this with those who read it.. I am still not sold on Chemotherapy.  I joke with Hack& Saw about creating all this drama just to get a boob job… but honestly, I could live without that too.. well… actually… technically at this point I guess I can’t.  Huh.  Funny and ironic.  🙂

‪#‎strongerthancancer‬ ‪#‎embracingtheadventure‬ ‪#‎killerleftboob‬ ‪#‎hawtrightboob‬ ‪#‎breastcancer‬